etaira

posted on 25.11.09

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it was like out first kiss all over again :)

He kissed me last night, for the first time, in a long time. Wow, honestly, I didn’t think him kissing me again would overwhelm me with so much emotion. It has been 2 months and 12 days since we broke up. We always talked here and there and lately we’ve been talking on a daily basis and seeing each other more often than before. It feels so good to be where we’re at right now. I know we’re still undecided and we are in that “its complicated” status (and we will be for a long time), but everything (the wait, the drive, the tears, the laughs, the time apart.. etc) has all been worth it. He has always been worth it. Oh happy day :) It was cute how it happened too! We were saying bye and I was leaning in for a “kiss on the cheek” kind of thing. Then he turns his head and “accidentally” kisses me. He looked at me with a big smile saying “you kissed me!” and I fell back like a little kid, face red and super giddy inside. Haha, lame. I don’t care what anyone says. To me, the kind of love that makes you feel like a kid again, the love that makes you feel like everything is happening for the first time, the love that keeps and stays alive even if there’s negativity surrounding it, the kind of love you can never get tired of … that’s what’s worth fighting for. That’s what I was and still if fighting for. Ay karumba :D what a great way to start my thanksgiving! :) I am so blessed.

posted on 24.11.09

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random #2

I was with a few friends yesterday for Marie’s birthday. The table was split; heartbreak one side, love drunk the other side. I don’t consider myself either, but I wasn’t about to sit in the middle of the table. One girl was known to be “fierce” and so outspoken … until she met her love. I knew her in high school previous to our meeting now (we ‘reunited’ about 2 months ago) and she was always that girl dating the boys (not slut-status, she just knew how to charm her way into the cute boys’ lives). Knowing her then and seeing how she is now is such a change. My other friend is also heartbroken (by one of my other friends *sad face*). She was always the cheerful one, no matter what. She had that huge smile on her face, to the point where her cheeks looked like they were going to explode. Again, everything is different. She just always looks mad. Her attitude is so melodramatic, with a touch of misery. I don’t like it. I understand I was depressed during my break-up. I now wonder how Jackie was able to keep her composure while I was so down. I can’t keep my composure seeing her like this. I guess I’m more pissed off that she’s heartbroken because of a friend of mine.

Either way, they’re both beautiful, strong and they WILL get through this. Be happy. Show those ‘boys’ that you don’t need them. Realizing that you don’t need them is the best feeling in the world. You feel so empowered —- like nothing in the world can bring you down. :)

“Promise yourself to be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind. Look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true. Think only of the best, work only for the best, and expect only the best. Forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future. Give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others. Live in the faith that the whole world is on your side so long as you are true to the best that is in you!” - Christian D. Larson

Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end. - Unknown

posted on 24.11.09

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this is random.

I noticed that I’m a tad bit boring. (LOL) I’m not that girl who’s blunt and speak out her mind — big boss bitch status. Not because I don’t speak my mind, it’s just I don’t really have a lot of things to say. I keep a lot of things to myself, partly because I don’t want to let just anyone into my life. I’m not that gorgeous girl that everyone gets googly eyes for. I’m not ugly either. I’m just that average girl (I think). I don’t go crazy at the club —- booty poppin’, floor slammin’, air humpin’ (or leg), bouncin’ on the floor kind of girl. I dance with my close friends and that’s about it. I don’t have a barbie doll body. My chubbs has settled in places (I think permanently) and refuse to diminish (99% my fault —- I <3 food and I don’t know what exercise means). I’ve never had braces —- so I don’t have that gorgeous smile, straight pearly white teeth that the boys melt for. I don’t have that cute (sometimes annoying) voice that guys love listening to. My nails aren’t always (actually they’re rarely EVER) maintained. I never brush my hair (no lie) and I have no idea how to put on make-up (I play with my face like a 5-year old kid). Basically, I’m not a lot of things that he (or whoever it might be) would consider ‘attractive’ or “hot”. At times I do find myself insecure because of what I’m not, then half-way into the thought, I slap myself silly for thinking that way. So reminder to self: I’m beautiful the way I am. I always try to be nice and caring to everyone I meet. I love to make people laugh. I can be “bitch status” (as my macey would say), but in the end, you’re always going think I’m one of the nicest people you’ve met. (Take that for granted, use and milk the ‘goodness’ out of me (lol — sounded funny) and you’ll regret it for the rest of your life). I’m not “bodacious” (haha I’ve always wanted to use that word) — but (as I always tell myself) I have curves in the right places, my hugs are warmer and even if I gained more weight, no one can floss it the way I do. And what if I never had braces? My teeth aren’t even that bad. *Be myself, be myself, be myself*. He fell in love with me because of who I was to begin with. Why try to be something I’m not?

That’s it. Enough ranting. Back to work :) ONE MORE DAY till its gobble gobble, happy thank you, eat until you pass out day!

PS. Happy birthday to my sissy Kristine! <3

PSS. I’m funny. lol

posted on 24.11.09
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Note to self: Never get attached to anything you are not prepared to lose.

(via maddilove)(armandoandres)

posted on 24.11.09
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“Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius, and it’s better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.”

— Marilyn Monroe (via marianerae)

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posted on 24.11.09
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“Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. So love the people who treat you right. Forget about the ones who don’t and believe that everything happens for a reason. Know a good thing when you see it and don’t let it slip away. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said it would be easy. They just said it would be worth it.”

— Unknown (via djma-mae)

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posted on 24.11.09
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11/23/09 | Ladies:

firstlady:

This is to the young girls: the ones who were misled into giving their all for a boy who wasn’t capable of showing his true feelings; the ones who felt like they weren’t worthy enough of being told the truth; the ones who were deceived, betrayed, cheated, lied to; the ones who tried so hard to fit in because they wanted everyone to like them; the ones who were let down, put down, and bashed; the ones who would cry themselves to sleep because they felt their life might no longer be worth living; the ones who experienced that young, puppy love, only to realize that the bliss would soon end; the ones who studied so hard for an ‘A’ and were still told to do better; the ones who thought they never belonged anywhere; the ones who worked hard just so everything would work out; the ones who tried so hard to please everyone and make them happy and seemed to get nothing in return; the ones who felt like they had no one to turn to, no one to look up to; the ones who wanted so quickly to grow up and not enjoy the countless blessings that life had to offer throughout the years; the ones who looked in the mirror and were never pleased or content with what they saw…

This is to the young girls, each and every one of them out there, who have felt this way or another- never give up. Life may be the beast, but you are the beauty that brings the light in. Stay strong and stay positive.

Ladies, maybe you were once this young girl. Be an example and show them that everything will be okay.

<2First Lady

Amen.

posted on 24.11.09
67

(via daphneemarie)

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posted on 23.11.09
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Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.

(via daphneemarie)

posted on 20.11.09
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So i’m browsing tumblr and what .. spots (SpotsPro) everywhere! Totally weird since spots hasn’t been a part of my life in so long. All these new cats are on the loose now. I remember when i first started… funny shit. It was a favor, for the infamous mr. Romeo aka Simoun. (Thanks for jump starting my car buddy, lol). I met a lot of amazing people joining spots. I’m from LA but I love my OC heads better. Haha. Nothing personal, its just SpotsLA was non-existent and I practically grew up with the OG heads (mostly from OC). I see them occasionally and I still keep in touch with them. I’ll probably post a super old picture up later :). I miss you kids!: Simoun, Nina, Mike, Ram, Rome, Wally, Mia, Gigi, Bee, Michelle and more + more + more.

Okay done with reminiscing! I need to be grown up and pretend to work for another 32 minutes.

Simoun: What’s gigi’s tumblr?!

posted on 20.11.09
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The A,B,C's of a FirstLady

firstlady:

A is for always maintaining a positive mindset.

B is for behaving like a Lady at all times.

C is for creatively using her talents and abilities to further her success.

D is for never doubting herself at any point.

E is for representing equality among everyone.

F is for the Ladies come First, always.

G is for the go-getter instinct that she possesses.

H is for not minding the haters, they come and go.

I is for her female intuition that almost never fails.

J is for not jeopardizing her beliefs for others.

K is for knowing what is best for herself and going after it.

L is for loving what she does and doing what she loves.

M is for The Movement; ladies making history.

N is for never giving up and going out without her manners.

O is for having an open mind and exploring all opportunities.

P is for being prepared for anything that comes her way.

Q is for being her own Queen, working for her throne.

R is for respect, if a Lady gives some, she must take some.

S is for seeking the optimistic side of situations, always.

T is for representing the truth; seeing, speaking, breathing, and living it.

U is for understanding and adapting to her environment.

V is for seeing victory at the other side of all challenges.

W is for woman; made with a heart, armor to protect it, and a mind to guide it.

X is for “x”-ing out those who don’t believe in her abilities.

Y is for saying “yes” to all possibilities for they are endless.

Z is for zero Ladies left out of The Movement; FirstLady™ represents all.